For a season I facilitated coaching networks for executive pastors—leaders who serve under the leadership of a senior pastor and are often responsible for the daily operations, the staff, and other large buckets of work. One of the most consistent lines of questioning I received from these leaders pertained to role clarity regarding decision-making and…
Leadership Communication
3 Questions to Help You Manage Your Boss
Nearly 35 years ago, two Harvard professors, John Gabbaro and John Kotter, published a seminal article titled “Managing Your Boss.” In the article, they wisely articulated that strong ties with your leader are best for you, your leader, and the organization. Effective leaders don’t only lead their teams well; they also excel in leading upward….
The Myth of Insider Language
The biggest myth of insider language is that there is really no such thing as insider language. “Insider language” will inevitably become outside language that everyone hears—meaning, it does not stay insider language. If it did, the term never would have been coined because no one on the outside would have heard the language that…
Leadership and Language
Wise leaders understand the importance of words. They grasp the importance of language in describing the culture of the organization and the direction she is headed. But the role of a leader in relationship to language does not end when the doctrinal statement is finalized. It does not end when the mission and values are…
The Words We Use Matter
In his book The Talent Code, Daniel Coyle tells the fascinating story of some experiments that Stanford psychologist and author Carol Dweck has conducted with fifth graders in multiple settings. The fifth graders were put into two different groups and given the same tests. After completing the first test, the first group was told, “You…
6 Ways to Build a Culture of Feedback
Under the guise of “being nice,” many leaders fail to offer feedback to those they lead. Instead, they often ignore or work around the deficiency. Because feedback is an essential ingredient in development, teams and individuals suffer when leaders fail to provide it. So how do you, as a leader, develop a culture of feedback in…
The Cruelty of No Feedback
Better an open reprimand than concealed love. The wounds of a friend are trustworthy, but the kisses of an enemy are excessive. (Proverbs 27:5-6) According to the proverb, it is loving to provide corrective feedback to those you love. Corrective feedback, of course, is not about being right or about making a point. The motivation…
When “Everyone Is Saying…”
Perhaps one day it will happen. Perhaps one day the statement “Everyone is saying…” will really mean everyone is saying. Perhaps one day the statement “A lot of people think…” will really mean a lot of people think. But so far, in nearly twenty years of ministry, “Everyone” has never been everyone. And “A lot…
Three Problems with Over-Quoting the Leader
In many organizations and ministries, people often over-quote their leader. Even in organizations where leaders involve others in decision-making, lead in community, and submit themselves to accountability, the over-quoting often occurs. It is an epidemic that lowers ownership, fosters disunity, and unintentionally creates the perception that the leader is leading in isolation. If I lead…
Discuss the Process
Imagine this scenario. A pastor and team of leaders invest months in crafting a vision or purpose statement. They have late-night meetings with pizza and M&Ms. They debate the wording. They choose key Scriptures to emphasize the direction of the church. They are filled with excitement, and they come up with a plan to share…